For many years, Mariska Hargitay thought she had Mickey Hargitay as her father. However, in the documentary My Mom Jayne, Sondra says she had no idea she was living a lie for 30 years.
The glamorous actress Jayne Mansfield was killed in a road accident when her youngest daughter, Mariska, was very young. Because of her upbringing with Mickey Hargitay, she felt oddly separated from her siblings.
The Moment That Made All the Difference
At age 20, everything changed for Mariska Hargitay after seeing a photo of Italian entertainer Nelson Sardelli from a period when Mansfield was separated from her husband, Mickey. I only needed to glance.
“It was like the floor fell out from underneath me,” she said. “Like my infrastructure dissolved.”
Despite the powerful realization, her attempt to confirm the truth with Mickey was met with denial. She never brought it up to him again.
A Long-Awaited Meeting with Her Biological Father
At age 30, Mariska Hargitay quietly attended one of Nelson Sardelli’s shows in Atlantic City. When she introduced herself, he immediately broke down in tears, telling her,
“I’ve been waiting 30 years for this moment.”
But the actress, torn between two father figures, couldn’t relinquish her loyalty to Mickey.
“I went full Olivia Benson on him,” she recalled, referencing her iconic TV role. “I was like, ‘I don’t want anything, I don’t need anything from you.… I have a dad.’”
Struggling with Identity and Acceptance
The emotional toll of the revelation left Mariska Hargitay grappling with deep questions.
“Was I wanted? Was I illegitimate? Am I Hungarian or Italian?” she asked.
Carrying the burden of not telling the truth made her life very difficult for years. Eventually, she grew to understand and accept Nelson, as well as his daughters, because she concluded that Jayne Mansfield had made sacrifices out of love for her child.
“I grew up where I was supposed to,” Mariska admitted tearfully. “I’m Mickey Hargitay’s daughter — that is not a lie. This documentary is kind of a love letter to him.”
Finding Healing in the Truth
Wanting to help others who also go through secrets, Mariska Hargitay wrote about her experiences in her book, My Mom Jayne. She also hosted a closed screening for Nelson’s daughters, who were there in Las Vegas.
“They just wept and wept,” she said. “These two women that I love so much — I made them secrets. It’s so heartbreaking to me.”
Mariska is now able to share her real life, which involves truth, love, and much-needed healing once she becomes honest.
